Losing a Friend

Today I lost a dear friend. Oh not the way it sounds; I lost one due to the well meaning intentions of my advice.
This all started a couple of days ago.....
I started out the day like I always do....checking and rechecking all my emails and social sites for people wanting answers to herbal questions and finding that I have no big issues to discuss; decided to hit a social site that is popular with all my friends.

As I was checking the site; noticed that a great friend and fellow alternative health enthusiast was discussing the dangers of a narcotic drug to a mutual friend that was prescribed by her doctor for pain. I put in my two cents and all hell broke out. I decided it would be best to step back and mull this over. After all; I didn't start the conversation and I didn't think it would be wise to fly off the handle. Never the less; today I decided that something more needed to be said and I said it. That was a mistake. The next thing I know; people are accusing me of wishing her death; accusing others of overstepping their boundaries and most of all; everyone getting in a heated debate over herb safety vs traditional meds.

The reason this was done was simple. I gave an opinion of something that was absolutely none of my business. Sure I did it in the spirit of friendship; thinking this person would actually help themselves to my knowledge and the co writer of this message. But what I have had to learn and re learn in the field I've chosen is this. Some people do not want my advice....some people do not want to quit high powered meds (even if they are dangerous and don't work well) and some people even may want to stay sick.

How can that be? The answer is as complex as human nature can be. First of all; a person has to realize why they are sick in the first place. Sometimes it's an old emotional issue that makes us hold onto our emotions and or try to “medicate” to make them go away. Sometimes it's a case of the person not knowing what to be if they aren't their illness. For instance a client of mine is convinced that they are never going to get well; but this illness keeps them full of warm fuzzys from well meaning friends feeling sorry for them. This person lives alone and has no one to make them feel special so they hang on to this illness as the only way they can get attention. If you asked them they would be appalled and deny this was happening. But when I put them on a flower essence they changed; so dramatically that they are now a much different person then a year ago!

This is a major undertaking in most people. You see we are taught by the medical field that disease hits us like a thief in the night; like a tornado or a mad dog; we don't know who will get it or how bad it'll be. This is not what alternative practitioners believe at all. In fact we believe that we are in charge of our health at all stages of our life. Our eating, and living choices are paramount to the health we have by those choices. Now having said that; yes we all die someday; but how long we live and how well well we live can be directly and indirectly be related to how this all ends up. Disease to us is a manifestation of how we take care of ourselves; not a Russian Roulette game with God.

It was mentioned today that herbs kill people too; that they are as dangerous as traditional meds are and that it's just a lifestyle choice which meds you wish to use. I would like to address this issue as it is probably the most incorrect of all the things said.
In the herbal world there are thousands of plants, roots and other parts of the plant kingdom that are utilized for the treatment of imbalances of the body. Some are used topically and others are able to be ingested.....some can be used for both purposes.
As an herbalist I find that most herbs are mild and extremely helpful in the world of health. While there are some that are considered cautionary and some even dangerous I don't see problems much in my line of work.
As an herbalist I treat the body; not the disease. I help the emotional person with liver herbs because a happy liver is a happy person. I recommend Aloe for the person with skin conditions as well as liver and kidney herbs to flush toxins from the body and therefore help the skin to heal. I don't use some herbs ever; such as Belladona or Blue Cohosh as they can be life threatening. They are unstable for use in someone that doesn't know their potential and I don't feel comfortable in dealing with potential problems.
However; in saying these things I find that most people don't have any issue with herbs at all. The biggest complaint I have heard is “I'm sick of taking pills!” or “ I have some diarrhea and don't like it”.....these are common complaints. It does get old taking pills; and there are many ways to help this; such as taking them all at once by opening them up and mixing with yogurt or blending in a smoothie (tastes awful though) but for most there are no issues.
The second complaint of diarrhea is a very common one; in fact not a bad thing at all when you consider what the body is doing. The body is designed to utilize food and water as best it can and then eliminate excess with the toxins in tow. If the body is toxic or stagnant; the tissues can become inflamed and sore; leading to health issues. This causes untold series of issues and will end in major disease if left untreated. So diarrhea is the body's way of eliminating a huge amount of toxins in a short period of time. Herbs help the body to actually work better to remove those toxins as well as utilize the food we eat and the water we drink. Now having said that; I don't recommend anyone having more than a day or two of diarrhea; and drinking lots of good clean water to replenish the fluids of the body. If you've ever had a bout with diarrhea you'll notice that you feel less heavy and tired after you replenish the body's water and nutrient intake in the following days. This is most helpful to the person as a whole as it eliminates many of the person's toxins easily.

The other issue I had with the idea of herbs being dangerous as meds was this. Traditional medications are very strong. In fact; the herbal world refers to most prescription and over the counter meds as poisons....which means that they are poisonous if taken in access. These medications are toxic if they are mixed with others and can actually kill a person by shutting down the body's functions. In contrast; if you take too much of most any herb; the most common side effect is diarrhea....the elimination of too much of something. When the amount of herb is back in balance in the body; the diarrhea leaves. Simple isn't it?

The point I'm trying to make here is this. Herbs are milder; more effective and for the most part less dangerous by far than the average aspirin at the drug store. This is an important distinction to make when you are faced with serious life threatening illness or disease.
So the next time you reach for the bottle of pills in your medicine cupboard; remember that the things you ingest can have a long term effect on all of you; not just the part that you are treating.